SWAAD - FCSP Dealing With Stress

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Dealing with the Stress

...when caring for your loved one.

It is normal to feel stress as a result of taking care of someone with a disability. It can be emotionally and physically difficult, and caregivers need to watch out for signs that it’s becoming harmful to their own health. You can take better care of your loved one if your own health is good.

Take a moment and ask yourself:

Do you feel low energy and less pleasure in living?
Are you becoming more isolated?
Do you feel out of control?
Are you using more alcohol, caffeine, tobacco or medications?
Are you having more health problems, such as high blood pressure or ulcers?
Do you have trouble sleeping or are you sleeping most of the time?
Are you having problems with memory or concentration?
Are you more irritable or impatient with others?
Do you think about suicide?

A “yes” answer to any of these warning signs may mean that you need to stop and consider your current situation. What is stressful for one person will not necessarily be stressful for someone else.

What is causing the stress for you?

Consider:

Are there too many demands on your time, energy and money?
Is it difficult to meet the physical or emotional needs of your loved one?
Do you feel that your freedom is limited to the point of being trapped?
Do you feel that other family members are not doing their share?
Are you uncomfortable having friends in your home because of your loved one?
Do you have less privacy?
Do you think your loved one asks for more help than is really needed?
Are you sometimes embarrassed by your loved one’s behavior?
Is there a lack of good communication with your loved one?
Are there other problems with finances, children, marriage and/or health?

When you take time to think about these questions and your answers to them, it will give you a good idea about the causes of your stress. And once you know what is causing the stress in your life, take time to identify the things you can and cannot change.

You cannot change another person, but you can change how you respond to that person. You can change your own actions and thoughts. And you can change how involved you are in caregiving. At some point you may need to make different arrangements for your family member if caregiving is damaging your own health.

Take care of yourself, too!

Don’t try to do it all. Having someone else do part of the work can reduce your resentment.
Ask for help from family and friends.
Take time to get away and do what you enjoy.
Find a good counselor, spiritual advisor or friend to confide in.
Exercise several times a week. It will help your physical and mental health.
Eat well and get enough rest.
Learn and use stress reduction techniques.
Join a support group.
Explore other care options so you’ll be ready if your relative’s condition suddenly worsens.
If you are feeling especially frustrated at a particular time, take a short break and go for a walk, listen to music or call a friend.
Use community resources for information and support services.

(Portions of this information, from The Caregiver Helpbook, Powerful Tools for Caregiving, are used with permission of Legacy Health System.)

Please call the Senior Information & Assistance office closest to you for more information.